Amazon is at it again

I was just browsing Amazon, as I do occasionally when I don’t really feel like being productive. As usual, I came across another useful gem.

Owner of little pug looks so proud of herself here. She clearly has no idea what she is in for.

May may I present to you the Puff-N- Fluff dog dryer. This thing just might be old news, but I don’t have cable TV (and I like it that way!), so it’s new to me.

I can’t say for sure, but I think this is just an overrated balloon with leg slots that you stick your dog inside of. Like a space suit.

After you have magically coaxed your pup, who is likely already agitated and wet following a bath, you stick your hairdryer in there. Presumably the idea here is to inflate the suit with warm air, providing your beloved doggo with a nice sort of hair salon drying experience.

I am not smiling because you bathed me and stuck me in a balloon space suit thingy. I plotting your demise, and smiling at the thought of your horrible, feces-covered death.

Now, I’m not sure about your dog, but I can tell you that all three of mine would be terrified of this contraption. I have enough trouble just getting them to sit still for something like a basic brushing or nail trimming. I can’t even fathom trying to stick them in a balloon suit and then turn on a hair dryer. They would have a conniption fit.

As a matter of fact, I bet you if I was to give them a bath and then stick them in this thing, they would poop all over themselves whilst running all throughout the house, and we’d be back worse than we started.

I have to say that I’m grateful to the guy who comes up with these ideas. They definitely provide me with an endless source of entertainment.

I may look harmless, but I’m actually getting ready to poop everywhere. And then I will chew your face and ankles clean off.

Feel like this is a thing you’ve got to have? You can buy one here. Please, if you do decide to invest in one of these, send me photos of the aftermath.

No Edamame for Me

Once upon a time, someone took the Wee Little Miss out for sushi. That someone was not me. The Wee Little Miss was hooked instantly, and has since dragged me very reluctantly to have sushi, to which I was very reluctantly hooked.

Recently, the Wee Little Miss and I decided to indulge and have lunch at a sushi restaurant. Now, mind you, I have only ever eaten sushi with the WLM. Not once have I ever snuck out to do this on my own, nor have I dragged The Hubbster to a sushi place. This is an experience that is exclusively a me-WLM thing. That should make it pretty clear that I’m not super experienced in these places.

Well, when we went this particular time, it was to a restaurant we had never been to before. At this place, they serve some kind of dumpling (which was delicious) and some edamame as appetizers. Except that we didn’t know these appetizers were coming to us. So, when the waitress brought them, it was quite a surprise.

If you’re unfamiliar with edamame, as I was, they are basically underripe soybeans still in the pod, which have been blanched and salted. They are eaten by sort of nibbling the pod open and ingesting just the bean from the inside of the pod.

Interesting fact: Edamame look exactly like sugar snap peas. Don’t believe me? Look.

Which is it? Edamame, or sugar snap peas?

Hint: this is the edamame. But you would never know that if you’d never seen edamame before or even been told that this was a thing that people eat, or how to eat them. I’m just saying.

Another Interesting fact: There are no instructions provided when you get edamame in a restaurant. Like, not even a warning, man. Come on.  I’m already reluctantly eating and enjoying raw fish. Warn a girl.

When the plate came out, the WLM saw dumplings and edamame, and knew what to do.

Know what I saw? I saw dumplings and sugar snap peas. Sure, that seemed weird, but no weirder than sushi seems to me. So, I dove in accordingly. I shoved half of that puppy in my mouth, took a solid bite, and began to chew. And chew, and chew. I’m sitting there thinking how awful it is, but I don’t want to be rude, so I keep chewing.

I then look up and see the WLM giving me the strangest look. She’s watching me, like she’s waiting for something to happen.

I shook my head and mentioned how gross it was. How it’s like chewing on a fuzzy stick. Gross.

At this point, the WLM, in true WLM fashion, says nothing and proceeds to demonstrate how to properly eat edamame. Apparently my way was wrong, and rather akin to eating corn with the husk.

How was I supposed to know that?! Nobody told me, especially the WLM. I told her I was relying upon her to help me know these things. She insists it is common knowledge. I disagree. Why serve me beans with husks and fuzz on them if I’m not supposed to eat it?

Come on.

Live and learn, I guess.